Have you ever peed on a frog?

Have you ever peed on a frog? Well I have, but didn't expect it. It probably wasn't what the frog was expecting either to be fair. One night I was getting ready for bed and the last thing I was going to do was pee.

I don't usually make it a habit to check in the toilet bowl before sitting down because normally the only inventory there is to take is toilet bowl water. All things were normal until I went to flush. As I turned and reached for the handle to flush, my eyes ran across the toilet bowl and I noticed a rather large eyeball staring up at me from the right rear side of the bowl. My heart lurched and stopped in mid-beat. I am terrified of spiders, so my first reaction was to pray, "Please don't be a spider.". As I said my prayer over and over, I looked closer and noticed that the owner of the eyeball was a large frog!

I had many thoughts running through my head all at once. What was a frog doing in my toilet? How did a frog get in my toilet? Thank God it didn't jump on my butt while I was peeing! What would I have done if it had jumped on my butt while I was peeing? How do I get it out of my toilet? Oh my God, what do I do now?

I got a plastic grocery store bag and tried to grab it using the bag as a glove. The frog mashed itself up under the rim of the toilet where the water streams out and I could not reach it. I tried flushing several times and that didn't flush it out. I finally closed the lid and went to bed because it was getting late and I had to work in the morning. I decided I would just use the other bathroom from now on and let the frog live in that one.

When I went to work the next day, I told the custodial staff about my problem and they were more than willing to help because they thought the frog was in my classroom toilet. They came prepared like a team out of Ghostbusters: Wearing gloves up to their elbows and carrying brooms and pails ready to do battle with my evil frog villain. After explaining the frog was at my house, one of the custodians offered to come and get it for me.

When the custodian arrived, my frog was nowhere to be found. The fearless custodian felt all around the toilet rim, but the frog had vanished into thin air. He told me if it came back to call and he'd come right away. I even cleaned the bowl to get rid of all the evil frog germs he had left behind. I kept the lid closed to be safe and went about my evening.

A few hours later I was sitting on my bed watching TV when I began to hear a thumping noise coming from my bathroom. I crept in and carefully peeked into my shower – there was no frog. I slowly lifted the toilet lid and looked around the bowl but did not see a frog. . . until I looked straight down in front of me, there was the frog looking right up at me! I think the frog and I both screamed as I slammed the lid down and called the custodian back.

He and another friend came right back over. He tried to grab the frog with a plastic bag in the same manner I had the previous night but the frog went up into the rim again. They used a metal stick, mirror and flashlight to force the frog out. All of the sudden the frog leaped over them and was hopping all around the bathroom floor! It hopped across the towel table and out the door into my bedroom!

The two men were tripping over one another trying to catch it as it hopped through my room. It finally made it's way under my bed where my cat was sleeping.
My amazing wonder cat never moved as a frog and two grown men crawled all around her. The frog hopped to the other side of my bed and to the top of my nightstand. He then found his way on to my bed and my pillows! Each time the men would try to catch him, he would hop to a new location, keeping one hop ahead the whole time.

Finally, he hopped from my pillow to the wall where one of the men was able to trap him with the plastic bag, sliding it around his body, capturing him – amazingly unharmed.

We put him in a container with some grass and water and I released him the next day at work so that he would not be able to find his way back into my toilet. However, I cannot sit on a toilet now without checking it out first to make sure there is no one looking up at me.